As stated, I have a mecha-suit for the pine trees (courtesy of the Lab) so their immobility won't be a problem.

Now, does snyone speak pine?

(Will talk about the Glitterjellyfish after I have gathered them with sugar cookies)

I should probably stay far way from that project, allergic…. could upset a few of them.

Ah, needs a bit more inflection and drawn out, but I think I get it.

Ne'ee'de-le Nee'dle Co-oo-ne', Coo'neen-eed-le' ned-le.

... are you guys talking to trees?
I mean i'm not judging or anything.

(that feeling of walking into a conversation late. LOL)

You can talk to trees by hugging them!

I think you insulted my pet badger... I don't have a pet badger.

.... This is getting hard. I really don't speak Pine too well.

We need plans to kill Santa. I think the only viable idea we got all day was maybe a Pine Tree Mech Suit army?

But that makes trees too powerful. Should we also get mech suits?

I know, CupcakeDolly. Talking pine is a necessary business nowadays. We trade water and phosphorous for fruit and sap from trees. But that Santa Claus. *shivers*

I have the shutdown function of course, no need to worry about that. Though I have these great invisibility semicrystal-laced suits and flamethrower gloves.

As to the Glitterjellyfish, I and Crystallyn Whisper created them in the Lab's Particle Accelerator Cauldron. Made of bended lightbeams - like a micriscopic web of mirror creatures colonized and linked together. They send out in response to touch bursts of gamma and beta rays, and communicate via motion. As said, they see me as a creator, and as such are loyal.

(I will draw these in time)

*Doesn't understand any of it*

So.. By putting lasers into the machine like this...
*takes laser gun and shoots machine*
Then run it...
*runs machine*
It then creates Jellyfish?
*Machine explodes*

Did... Did I?

*A massive Laser tentacle from the GIF-dimension appears, then fades away*

Not quite. See, you need to melt glass and metals (tin, silicon, and mercury), then accelerate the resulting alloy/composite material until the atoms become unstable. Then, you take these lovely microscopic extremophiles that have been nurtured in the bottom of a cauldron and feed the unstable reflective matter to these creatures, their offspring will be colonial and like a radioactive mirror in ability. Indirectly, it produces glitter waste. Direct touch is deadly.

I can see this waste getting everywhere... Glitter shares with everyone!
The whole world would be effected by it's waste and the world would slowly die.

.... Let's save that as a last resort.

So.. What if we steal Christmas?

Oh, that would be more difficult - see, the Santa isn't the one who owns Christmas. It is a holiday whose shares are rumored to be split between many organizations.

But, if we spread like a shadow organization, targeted to take down the leaders with our cheer...

Those bastards!

Oh right.. I heard of that. Didn't his heart become too big for his body and died soon after?

Actually the poor sod was forced to connect himself to an Iron Heart, and had to carry it around with him in a large wagon for the rest of his life.

The dastardly Jolly Old Elf inflicts fates worse than death to those who he catches. So we have to be careful.

Terrible. Just terrible.

I just got information about his second in command Mrs. Claus. I don't know what I'm reading, but these readings say that she is a big "Ho ho ho"

Can anyone translate?

Ho Ho Ho?

The Holy Order of Holly Hookers? Well then she is a might big Ho…..

I've never heard of such Order! I should gather Intel on this!

*talking to some people*
Yes.. Uh huh... YOU DON'T SAY.
*Ahem*

Well. Uh. I'm pretty sure Santa is already aware of all this. So I doubt trying to ruin him by telling him any of this would do anything.

So uh. I hear there's been work in the lab they made a super powerful Fruitcake!

Do you think that we could plant spies into this organization? Are they trained assassins? Do you know anything about their training?

Surely nobody knows till they try. I mean, if they're trained assassins and CAN'T be infiltrated, nobody would've lived to tell the tale and we won't know. Call one of them and tellem you wanna join.

So after my... "Investigation" of their group, I can personally say they are.. VERY TALENTED at what they do. I personally don't think we can trust them by any caliber. All I have to say is stay strong, because they will wipe you clean.... Of any information they might need.

Unless your me of course who didn't do that.

*pats Illusion on the head* You just don't know how to talk to women…. I got this

Go Tiva go!

*Eating popcorn*

.... O.O.
*Internal scars ensue*

*Comes back smelling like holly and pulling mistletoe out of her hair* Well we either just got a spy in the Order or I just married one of them…. either way it works

The Pines have prepared a Cedar Missile Strike. Somewhat like Orbital bombardment. Get me the location of Santa's elf-slave-making plants.

That is.. Uh. Congratulations I'm so happy for you?

Christmas is tomorrow and we are no where though.. What if we trump Santa by making a even better holiday? Like.... Coool... Present.. Awesome.. Majigger.. Day.

Yeah Likecoolpresentawesomemajigger Day!

Eh, it happens. Not like I don't end up married lots….

Yeah but what day will it be? And wouldn't that be ripping off the Catholics and All Saints day?

Well Santa does that same with his holiday...

The problem is that we need workers to make toys. So what if we free the elves and have them work for us? Then to transport the presents we... USE THE MAILING SYSTEM!

How about Boxing Day?

Amazing!
People will open up bodes full of nothing !

Or better yet. Bubble wrap.

We're going to enslave the slave-elves?

*Leaves a "Nietzsche" card*

No no no. They're jobs where they get paid. Since they're already skilled in toymaking it gives them a option to work and make some money.

Ah, okay. This radio-based brain scrambler should free them of Santa's mind control.
That, or these welding cutters on any control devices.

Free the Elves!

What if they're like the HP house-elves and don't want to be freed? Shouldn't we send a rep to meet them discreetly and put forward what we're ready to do?

GUYS. There's been sightings of our foe!

Neat tracker, even tells where he's headed in the next minute or two. RALLY OUR RALLIES FOLKS WE GOTTA INTERCEPT THIS GUY!