The Fist is your physical strength, your drive to fight back against others, the world, and even life itself. The desire to never give up, to keep pushing when life gets hard. The strength to never surrender.

The Torch is the strength of mind, to be able to think as an intelligient individual. To have the ability to not only think for yourself, but to learn from your mistakes and not repeat them.

The Book is the strength of the spoken word, and gives you the strength to stand by your convictions and and defend yourself with your own words. To be an intelectual who can stand their own in open debate.

These are the three strengths that, in my oppinion, can make anyone strong. Morally, physically, and mentally.

oh i see.. well i mean like.. is it some sort of test? or something.. i dont know >< but i get what you mean.. i just dont know how to find that out about oneself.. do i make any sense? D:

Of course you do :).
All I can say is that the test is you. When you find that you can be brave and have the courage to do what's right when others dont.

I dont know what either of you believe religiously, or if you believe in fate, but I believe that fate tests you. I learned that I could be brave when a pair of dogs, which included a rottweiler, attacked my neighbor and her grand daughter. I didn't know why I decided to go check the mail when I did, but when I did I saw the dogs trying to attack them. I didn't think about my own safety, I didn't call for help, I only acted. I know how to, for a lack of better words, control and communicate with dogs, and I made the animals back off by showing that I was the dominate male. When they advanced on me, I advanced on them. And they backed off.


A few weeks later, the same thing happened at where I went to school during a thunder storm. Two dogs, including a bitch who'd recently had a litter of puppies which makes a bitch even more aggressive, were attempting to attack one of my teachers. We were told to stay inside while someone called animal control, but I knew she had a daughter, and I acted. When I say, "I acted" i dont mean I decided to suggest the proper way to deal with the situation, I mean I physically pushed my teacher from that given class out of my way and advanced on the dogs, yelling at them to back off. She got to safety, and I was eventually able to get back inside aswell. But those were what I concider my tests, which decided whether or not I could transition from a boy into a man.

honestly right now i dont know what to believe.. i know for sure i dont believe in the church but i do believe in jesus.. >>
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IAhDGYlpqY
^ that is just perfect to me. but i also do believe in fate and such.. im just at a point in my life where i dont know hwat to believe. im so confused

Then believe in what's right.
The Church is only a way to communicate with God through the Vatican.
Jesus himself said to avoid worshipping in groups. I personally havent stepped foot in a church for any reason other than to attend a funeral in nearly 5 years, but I'm a very religious person. You dont have to talk to a man in robes to talk to God. God is God. Neither man or woman, but simply something that is everywhere.

I spent years searching for answers, studied dozens of religious beliefs, and read many religious texts, and I relised the answers were already right there in front of me. I dont know how old you are, but I wont tell you my personal beliefs without being asked. It's not my right. All I can tell you is to believe that there is something out there and that it's alright to ask questions.

im 18.. well i know that and all.. but i just dont know. i was raised by going to church is the most important thing ever. i just dont think its right....
you can tell me i dont mind

Well, I guess to put things into perspective I'll tell you a bit about myself; I was raised Catholic, and by in large I am Catholic. I even went to a catholic school, granted that was because I beat the living hell out of a bully at my first school. But I saw things that I didn't like; Bible thumppers & Baptists who tell you to live this way, but treat others like crap because they were'nt the right kind of Christian (I still dislike Baptists because of their mentality).

So, I looked for answers. I was pagan for a long time, but I read the Quarran, Torah (First Testament), the lost books of the Bible, the translations of various hebrew scriptures, Taoism, Budhism, Sikhism, Hinduism, you name it I read it. And I noticed they were all telling very similar stories, etc.

I'm a very Old Testament individual, and while I believe that Jesus is the Son of God and forgiving, I believe that God is a wrathful God. I believe he does not help us, or curse us, by request. I believe that God is not forgiving. I also believe in angels and demons, I even wear the seal of the King Solomon so that I can be protected from evil, but my personal, fundamental, beliefs, rival those of other Christians, and even straddle Herrisy. (I also dont take the Bible as hard core "This is what happened" because you have to keep in mind that many of these stories are, in fact, historical, but were written as far back as 6K years ago.)

Your biggest argument today between Science and Religion is Creationism and Evolution. "The Bible says this" "Science says this", I say it's bullshit. I say they prove each other. For instance; The Bible says that before Light, there was Darkness. Science says before the Big Bang there was nothing. The bible says there was, in this order, earth, water, plants, animals, people. Science says Life Evolved as; Earth formed, primordial goo made life, plants formed, then animals, then people. And just to seal in the deal; Bible says that all mankind comes from Adam, and Science has proven that every single man on the face of the planet shares the exact same genetic code that links them all together back to 1 guy damn near 80,000 years ago.

I believe that we all share a link to God, and that we can all communicate with him. You dont need a man in a robe to tell you what God thinks, because God can tell you what God thinks. Whether your pagan, christian, muslim, we all believe that in life you have to be a good person, and live an honorable life. Yes, we are a violent species, and yes wars have been fought over religion for centuries. But that is because we are human. Look at animals, and dont let anyone tell you that animals arent violent. Watch the Chimps in the congo and you will see that they also fight actual wars with eachother over territory. Eliphants kill other eliphants for the right to claim a female as their own. Hell, cats torture other animals just for the fun of it.

But as far as faith and religion are concerned, Faith is something that you learn. Religion is something you practice. But Belief, that is the most important aspect of it all. Belief is believing in something. Belief is up to you. You know?

i agree with everything you said except one thing. you see i was raised lutheran. i believe that god is a kind god who loves us very much. i guess its because the way we were raised. you coming from a catholic background me from lutheran. its a little different but yeah. I do believe in God and Jesus but i honestly believe God loved us very much.

but everything else you said i do agree with XD <3

Lol, well its Catholic to believe that God is kind and loving aswell, I'm just different. I'm very Old Testament in many redgards, and believe that when bad people die in... lets say, entertaining ways, I believe that is God having a sence of humor.

But I'm kinda surprised you agree with alot of what I said ^^;

oh i guess i was wrong then.. i though Catholics thought he was a vengeful god. sorry xD i get them mixed up a lot...

well its what i think as well i mean im still really confused as to what i believe but that pretty much is what is running through my mind

Lol, well for what it's worth, I'm thinking of calling my brand of theology something. I just dont know what yet.

call it cronisology! XD lol jkjk C:

Lol, the thought had occured to me.
But I just believe in living a good moral life as best as possible. But I also believe in the right to protect yourself, no matter what.

yeah that sounds good to me. C:

-gets off his soap box now, thinking he scared Airi away-

airi had to go clean and i think she was tired ;-;

Ahhh, ok I see.

yeah im pretty sure she went to bed ):

I haven't yet i'm just about to

oh awuhhh.. ill miss you terribly

Alright, night Airi.
I guess aside from everything I said earlier, just try to believe in yourself if anything.
Personally, not many people like me, but I try to not let it bother me.

I'm sorry sweetie today just hasn't been a very good day and i need to sleep....

-hugs Airi- Night. :(

i know how you feel.. today hasnt been so good for me either

I'm sorry to hear

its whatever... last night was terrible as well..

I'm sorry, but I caught a glimps of your profile wall conversation.
I know it doesn't mean much, but I know what it's like to feel that way about things. I also know that it doesn't help to say it gets better. But it does.

that was only really part of it.. there was a lot more that happened.. idk the same stuff kinda happened again tonight. it seems like everyone hates me all the time... im a very sensitive person... i wish i wasnt..

I know how you feel, in a way.
I also know what it's like to be overly sensitive about things.

i wish i was strong like everyone else.. i just... hate how i am all the time

It gets better with time.
I've spoken to alot of people on this site, and alot of people on this site do not like me. But alot of them are like you.

i like you. i dont understand why people dont like you ):

and they seem a lot stronger than i am

I'm honest and I say things people dont like.
Alot of people, and I actually think even members of the staff, just see one portion of who I am, and see one fraction of the things I've said, and have decided they dont like me. But I've come to terms with that.
I've even come close to quitting the site twice now, and frankly I only hang around so I can talk to one person.

I've also had a really bad 8 months, and on top of things my girlfriend left me, but I just have to keep pushing on. You know?
I guess the worse part of it all was trying to open myself up to others, and getting pushed away again, and honestly I wish I could stop carring as much as I do, because life would be easier. But can I be honest with you about something?

im so sorry thats horrible.. ): i dont see why they would hate you though. i find you an interesting person and i like talking to you ^^ <3

//huggles
... im really bad at responding to stuff like that ;-; it just makes me feel horrible.. and i really wish i could help..

okies?

It's fine.
But I guess my question is; Is that you in those links in your signiture?

im truly sorry...

yep that is really me... i have tons more photos and ill webcam with you if you dont believe me XD

That'd be up to you, but I just wanted to make sure before I said my next bit.

You're a cute girl, and your going to be a beautiful woman. But you cant let things get to you. I know it's hard, but you can be strong.

if you wanted you could add me on skype XD lol asamilovesyouu

thanks.. i just dont think so.. i think ill be destined to be a mother and thats about it. i wont do much in my life except raise kids and im happy with that.. i just wish my parents would let me actually go to college.. or something..

-pats your back-
Not to be crass, but not many girls look the way you do.
Play your cards right and you'll get a good guy.

i dont understand... i think i look plain.. very ordinary...