Oh...
*Much cursing as that was only 1/3 of what was written*

Not only are the snakes mostly handled his soldiers are actually completely impervious to them -- they're wearing powered, exoskeletal titanium armor. Honestly, we all should have just retreated down the hallway and let them block off the entrance, speaking tactically.

Depending on the type of venom, stiffness from swelling is quite possible. Also, muscle cells can turn stuff when battling foreign substances.

TBH, Dante's decent constitution gives him a bit more time than any normal person in terms of how long it'd take for him to succumb to the toxin's effects. Hence, he wouldn't be puking or running a fever until an hour or so in.

I...okay, I...oh, fine. Hmph.

Dante is dead in 10 minutes. He is lucky it isn't the soul-stealing kind. (May be bending it here, but that may be because it has the tortured angel's soul)
I need to research the dying process, now...in a while...
*Is in the habit of burying the dead, bot so much seeing their final moments, unless it is sudden death stuff...

Okay...as said, I am used to dealing with road splats and burying those who died overnight. I'll need to look it (dying) up some more.

-grimace- I think most of the people in here aren't quite right in the head. Hell, I might even be the only one who's never actually had to deal w depression. Yet.

*Offers Flower*

Are you a mortician, Lawtan?

Nope. Just life.

Suze, correct me if I'm wrong, but Law -- I think you use a few too many adjectives and names at times.

I don't know, I've definitely seen worse, and the names thing is a bit of a tough call with how many characters we have on-screen, when the default is to, for instance, call Dante "the blind man", that really shouldn't happen more than once a post.

I didn't notice all that many adjectives in his last post, or at least where there were they were conveying relevant or semi-relevant information for the most part. I mean, there are probably places where the rhythm of a sentence would be helped by excising them, but again, I'm a lot more lenient on RP posts than I am on formal writing.

If I had to call out one thing, it'd be the instance where Rurik is "rapidly clawing", it's a good example of when not to use an ad-verb, since it doesn't really tell us anything essential about the action or why he's performing it. Lawtan, you seem to be pretty good with ad-verbs in general, though, since I haven't noticed many like that so far, which is good. (I tend to notice :P)

Anyway, you *can* have Kadia do something too, if you want, Law, either in this post or just make a separate one. When we talk about keeping your posts reined-in, we mean the actual content of what happens, you can make them 7 or 8 paragraphs or more if you want to really get into the psychoses of what your characters are going through (see Salone's posts :D), but it's hardly necessary, either.

Just need to find your balance. :)

Anyway, I'll probably make a post tonight with Thomas (don't have much for Diogenes to do, but we'll see.), so if anyone wants to squeeze anything else in before then, now's your chance.

I would say don't be lenient - my education sucks, in truth - but also, that I can't correct everything at once, and as Espy could tell you, I have a strong personal inclination to "focus on only one thing" and simultaneously "do everything at once."

What is confusing to me is that I can't personally tell how the other posts are better.

I think I made a mistake with Kadia...I am not sure I can write her correctly, as of yet...and there is a great deal of my issues that come into writing her. She is supposed to be stronger than she is, but so far is coming across as an ant-like rebel crybaby.