Been there and those times are horrible. I really hope things get better for you.; ; *hugs*

-hugs back-

Trying to do what my therapist says and remind myself of the truth. Stuff really isn't as bad as I keep viewing it as.

Thats good. I hope you keep up the great work and get better soon.!~

I'm certainly doing all I can to do so :3 Work helps distract me.

That is great to have distractions. Wished I had more. I started playing Kingdom Hearts Birth by Sleep which works great so far.

Work takes up a lot of my time but I'm so drained afterwards it's hard to keep going sometimes. Work is not bad and rather fun but long hours are draining.

Ya I can imagine they are. When my hubby worked long hours and he still does, he is so drained its hard for him to do anything. But at least you are keepying postive!

If I didn't absolutely adore my job it would probably be a lot harder to stay positive.

Yes it would be. I'm having a hard time staying upbeat right now. Noticed I've been getting really depressed alot lately and I am wondering if trying to force myself into staying happy is the wrong choice. Maybe I should give into it. ; ;

Well that's a big dilemma. Saiyouri, I would never want you to force yourself to be happy. That just hides the issues and won't fix anything at all. On the other hand I would never tell you to give into depression either. Is there a third choice? Something else that could possibly be done? I can try to listen if that helps.

Thank you so much Serra. That is so nice of you. *hugs* I have no idea what happened but I felt a ton better today. I guess I needed a day to just cry during the day for who knows what reasons to make me happy. And Gintoki is not feeling well so that might of pushed me out of it too.

Not sure on a third choice. I thought of everything I could possibly think of and nothing works >.< I have tried talking to people but its like they don't care and no one seems to know what to do with a person who is severely depressed ; ; And being raised in a family you were not allowed to express your true self or feelings doesn't make it any easier. I don't even know how to talk to people about my problems to be honest. That sounds so retarded >.>;

Well Saiyouri, if I were around more I'd say you could talk to me. Well, you can always talk to me but I can't give the amount of time I think I would need to sufficiently listen to you. I don't want to make it seem like I don't care because I do care about you.

As for learning to not express yourself, I wasn't taught that by others but I did teach it to myself. I tend to think that my opinion is worth it if it conflicts with someone else's. I've been teaching myself to express myself more as well as give my own opinions some worth. I'm sure you can do that too :3

I will try to do it. Sorry I haven't posted in awhile. Things got bad here. My cat Gintoki I thought was constipated and 5 days later I found out it was a kidney rupture and he was actually dying of renal failure. He died before we could get him to the vet Friday morning and I'm going out of my mind with grief and so is his sister Lavendar. ; ; Last night was hell on me. I'm waiting right now to get the call that his ashes are in at the humane society so we can get a urn for him. ; ; God this is hell for sure. I really hope things have been a ton better for you at least.

Oh no...Saiyouri... -hugs-

As for me, stuff has been mostly alright. Been really busy with work but I have been super annoyed at my roommates. It's like they constantly press my buttons. I'm trying my best to deal with it however. Work is being a very good distraction.

At least you have a distraction. I'm glad things are pretty good for you. I hope they get better.

Thank you. *hugs* I haven't heard from the society yet on his remains being in but that is ok. The longer I have to wait the better. Lavendar doesn't look at me with the most depressing look in her eyes as much and I am getting better with the grief, just dehydration is harder to deal with lol ~_~ FML! We are thinking of trying to adopt a puppy and I really want it. It's a pitbull, weinaminer (or however you spell those klutzy lanky doggies) and maybe lab in there too. I so have her name picked. Most likely will be Grune Legendia. LMAO I wonder where that name is from?? HAHAHA But Grune for sure. Still working out the kinks for her middle name hehe.

Grune Legendia is a great name :3

Sorry for the delay in answering, I worked so much on 11/15 and 11/6 I barely came here at all @.@ Stuff has just been so crazy busy. I hope things have been well for you the past few days.