Trisphee

Trisphee (http://www.trisphee.com/forums/index.php)
-   Writers' Journals (http://www.trisphee.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=19)
-   -   s a n c t u a r y (http://www.trisphee.com/forums/showthread.php?t=1746)

Espy 10-03-2010 12:31 AM

s a n c t u a r y
 
Musings of Espy. Potentially best served with rueful solipsistic laughter. No longer updated on front page.

Espy 10-03-2010 12:31 AM

This one I did for school. Hehe~ Bonus points for guessing which poet I'm imitating.


Espy 10-03-2010 12:33 AM

Creative Writing class stuff:

worlds. (Had to include three words chosen from a classmate's list of favorite words.)

"worlds" was meant to be read in one breath and really quickly. Unfortunately my teacher didn't quite like my tongue's speeding.


little lies. (For this one, we took one line from a classmate from the above exercise and used it as the first of a six-line poem.)


underwater. (A "response" to Sharon Olds's "The One Girl at the Boys Party", written from a different point of view.)

it's got a cubic shit-ton of math references, almost one on every line.

Punch (Much different from my usual poetry. We had to take a cliche, chosen at random, and create a poem revolving around it. This one's not as dark as the others, and silly bordering on ridiculous. It's got a tacky rhythm too. More practice with alliteration and assonance.)


masks (Written for a slam poetry competition in the CWrit class. It's a group poem, hence the three-line series.)

Espy 10-03-2010 12:33 AM

Personal stuff
 
War


tomorrow (based off and quoting from Macbeth; done as an impromptu response to Funkduder's poems, haha...)

Espy 10-29-2010 11:37 PM

Eehhhh.
Someone wanna critique?

Ashy 12-30-2010 07:32 PM

i like the first one :o

With The Current 02-13-2011 12:12 AM

I agree, the first one is nice

Espy 09-30-2011 02:39 AM

-kicks the thread- Updated. Will add more later.

DarkForbidden-Love 09-30-2011 10:01 PM

I liked "Worlds" and "Little Lies" Tried two different speeds on "Worlds" and thought it sounded better when read slowly.

Espy 10-01-2011 12:30 AM

Ah, really? Didn't plan for it to be that way, but reading it again, I see what you mean, it's better slower. Whoops >.>

And thanks :)

Espy 10-01-2011 05:30 PM

Updated again. I really should post stuff other than my poetry, but I doubt anyone wants to read a six-page story.

DarkForbidden-Love 10-01-2011 06:29 PM

In 'underwater' you forgot to capitalize i in the last line. Nevermind this then It the second word in. I found this part "knees bent in the to not slip," I'm not sure if you ment it this way or if I'm just not getting it.
Sorry for nitpicking your work but I so like the new poems. 'Punch' was funny even if not you normal style.

Espy 10-01-2011 06:41 PM

Fixed; it now reads "in the effort to not slip". My recent poems don't have any capitalization, except for Punch. Dunno why.

And thanks again >__<

Quiet Man Cometh 10-02-2011 07:30 AM

The second one is irritatingly familiar but the precise answer isn't coming. Shot in the dark and say Johnathan Swift?

Espy 10-02-2011 01:04 PM

Your shot was amazingly accurate >.> -hugs- Yeah, Swift, an assignment last year.

Quiet Man Cometh 10-03-2011 12:04 AM

Heh. He's the first one I thought of when I think sarcasm, so I suppose it was a shot in the dark against someone talking ;). "The Lady's Dressing Room", perchance?

Espy 10-15-2011 10:46 PM

Actually, now that I think about it, it was mostly based off Chaucer, with a tiny bit of Swift. Canterbury Tales and A Modest Proposal.

And updated.

Espy 10-31-2011 12:24 AM

Updated again; yay for impromptu >.> My brain works too quickly sometimes.

...and often RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF MY DAMN HOMEWORK.

Quiet Man Cometh 10-31-2011 01:13 AM

I usually get them when I'm either walking on the street or doing something else, always with a writing implement and reasonably clear surface just far enough away to forget at least some of what I wanted to write. Last time it was while watching a nature show and a fox huunting stuff beneath the snow.

*leap* *Piff!* Om nom.

Espy 10-31-2011 01:16 AM

-loves foxes hunting in snow-

They're. So. Prettyyyy. How you target prey that you can barely see or smell is beyond me.

Espy 12-11-2015 03:21 AM

gray
stagnant
solitary
in a whirling sea
of
color
a sea that changes
so many times
every second
that it doesn't
(does it?)
change at all
stops
moving.

like a lone shadow
amongst autumn leaves
monochromatic stain
drifting
wandering
watching
(ever)
watching.

dull ink
on
vibrant hues
waiting
pondering?
but
devouring.

black
and color
is still
inky
black.

"nihilistic
solipsism"
some may call it
erroneous
narrow
(mis)guided
un-

thinking.

colors
polluted
a taught habit
eating
consuming
regurgitating brown
"spectrum"
they know best
(or so thought)
try everything
do everything
absorb
everything
return
brown.

essence changed.
(for better
or for worse?)

black
unchanging
unyielding
tries
everything
does
everything
absorbs
everything

and eventually
(perhaps after a eon
or two)
returns
unscathed
unaltered
conscious
(while so many aren't)
of its essence
unseen
unnoticed

minutiae's metamorphosis
held close
quiet shifts
hidden
locked
away

and brought forth
only when the ink spreads thin
where others would fade
black
(and its heart)
shine forth
true
colors.

Espy 12-14-2015 04:11 AM

Cold again.
Burning, icy cold.
Down my throat I pour molten gold
Try to thaw the searing glacier
Creeping upwards
Ever upwards
Leisurely
Without a care in the world.
Skin shattering,
Shimmering shard-like,
Crystalline remnants crumbling
Cutting into corrupted veins.
Jaws frozen
Half open,
Turgid tongue testament
To words unspoken,
Ravaged by ringlets
Of fierce frostbitten flames.
And the essence that emerges,
Those frigid fires gone astray,
Surging forth, consuming, razing,
Not what I meant to say.
edit: hopefully slightly less jarring.

Espy 12-16-2015 07:19 PM

time ticking
ardor departed
gray
hollow
nil.

Espy 12-24-2015 02:21 AM

Flash of crimson
is
what?
I grasp at it -
Fled to the deepest, darkest
Most depraved corner of my mind.

Ethos forsaken
Cogitation convoluted

Pale, sickly limbs
Clinging, miserly
To scraps of fading light
Vestigial hope
In a world left forsaken
Disowned by who else

Drawing ruinous breath
To watch the pillars of aspiration fall
Basking in the unearthly keening of the self
The darkened skies radiating ash
A corruption of snow.


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:43 PM.

Powered by vBulletin®