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Granted but you have become both her butt monkey, and her new Kami.

I wish that my papers were completed and given a good grade.

granted but they were immediately ripped up.

I wish my friends were online when I am.

Granted, but your internet connection is so lousy that it doesn't matter if they're on or not.

I wish I could control whether it's daytime or nighttime, so I can go on a sunlit walk at the dead of night!

Granted, however it rains anytime you are outside.

I wish for the next post on this thread.

Granted, but it's not a particularly good one.

I wish for all the dragon balls!

Granted. You get the wrong kind of balls, and now all dragons are eunuchs.

I wish for a snow day.

Granted, but now you're stuck at home and ran out of grocery. Oh dear.

I wish I don't have to work 5 days a week.

Granted - you have to work 7 days a week!
I wish to go back in time by 4 months...with memory of what has happened, and what will happen...and an ability to affect change and live my life...

Granted, but the next day when you wake up, you find out that going back and the change you made was only a dream.

I wish that I could instantly watch any movie I wanted without having to download/stream anything.

Granted; you become Hollywood, sex, drugs, suicide, and all.

I wish to skip my next wish.

Granted; but you must grant all the wish you see

i wish for a kingdom to rule over

Granted: You are now owner of a bankrupt Burger King

-skipped wish-

The Thread Train appears. It grows to monstrous proportions. Steam hisses and wails as boilers and cylinder cocks shift and rearrange. Thousands upon thousands of metal plates unhinge themselves and restructure, reforming into a hulking bipedal mass of steel and steam. Transforming Thread Train leans down in to your face and warns you very sternly.

"Do NOT derail the Thread Train."


I wish for a Donkey of Infinite Stamina.

Granted. You have a donkey of infinite stamina.

Alas, it refuses to walk beyond your front door. Yes, it insists on living inside your house.


I wish for cheese.

You now have expired cheese. It is also Cottage Cheese. Severely expired Cottage Cheese.

I wish for a d20 that only rolls natural 20's.

Granted, but your DM bars in on account of every number on it is a 20.


I wish for dice of invisibility!