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granted but the topping fell off getting it home and now there is pizza gunk in the passenger seat of your car and not on your pizza



i wish my art commissions would space out better so that instead of 50 dollars in three days then no work for the rest of the week i would get one or two a day throughout the week

Granted, but the commissions are such huge requests that they would take you dozens of years to complete. You get one new one every couple of days, and the work piles on until you have hundreds of unfinishable projects you need to do.

I wish my dude guy hadn't drank'd all my vodka while I was sleeping. T-T

granted but he drank it while you were awake instead


i wish my cat was not bitey

Granted, but it's now purrey and meowey instead, most often while you're trying to concentrate or sleep (like my cat T_T).

I wish I had a lovely plate of home cooked food to eat!

Granted, but it's cooked by the home, so it sits on a plate awkwardly becoming room temperature before being served to you. By the home. It's horrifying really and makes your insurance skyrocket.

I wish for a TT-33 Tokarev!

Granted but it backfires and gives you a nasty black eye!

I wish I could sleep!!

Granted, but you can't from the sound of me whining about getting beaten up by my favorite firearm!

I wish for more time. More time to do things.

Granted but now your are immortal and watch all you love die!

I wish I had money

pfffft he is already like that X''D


granted but it's all in bonds and cannot be used


i wish my shoulders would stop aching

Granted, but they are now so relaxed that you are unable to move your arms at all.

I wish I had socks for my cold feets!

Granted, but they're cold socks that leech heat from you!

I wish for Louis XIV to release a new album!

Granted, but their special guest singers for every song on the album are Justin Beiber and Taylor Swift.

I wish I knew what to do next.

Granted, but you are rendered unable to actually do it due to multiple unrelated events, thereby forever setting you back.

I wish I could become a pilot!

Granted, but you become Amelia Earhart.

I wish I could not be naked.

granted but it is because you are asked to babysit a dozen small children for a week

i wish that i could come up with a wish that could not be corrupted

Granted, but when you come up with that wish, the world implodes and unmakes the universe and everything that exists. Nice going.

I wish for raspberry syrup to mix into my drinky drink!