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You can file for a payment plan with the IRS. I've done this before. It's surprisingly painless. You can also file for an extension if you think you can get the money together by October. IIRC there's a filing fee in both cases but it's a lot better than the missed-payment fees the credit cards will hit you with.

I should really eat but I just woke up fifteen minutes ago...
also I'm neglecting my personal health and well-being again. :/
Lately I'm just not interested in doing...well, anything. <:/ Not writing, not drawing, not video games, just..nothing.
So I guess I'll veg out and do some laundry or something..I dunno.

getting lowkey depressed over not wanting kids because i have no idea if i'd make for a good parent or not. i'm also ace.

not to mention that i'm terrified of my niece because i don't want to end up hurting her because i know my temper's bloody awful and i'm not the most patient person.

i don't know why i'm thinking abt this shit at sixteen.

16 is definitely too early to be worried about it. I don't mean that disparagingly; that's a natural time for the thought to cross people's minds. But you can rest easy, because you're still growing up, and your opinions and identity are still evolving.

Identities can be fluid over time. Maybe you'll always be ace, maybe you won't; I'm not one of those people who says ace people just haven't learned better yet. But IMO 16 is a little too early to be certain that you're ace, because you haven't even reached full physical maturity; sexuality isn't a concrete part of one's identity yet.

.n. I'm ace but I didn't always think so. It wasn't until I had a couple different relationships that I finally figured out that I wasn't sexually attracted to either of them, and that one of the relationships out great but we weren't compatible, while the other turned out to be with, well, the worst person I've known... :c
In fact, they're probably partially the reason I'm very closed off, have extremely poor self image views and am saddled with some anxiety...

But good news is I'm comfortable with my sexuality now. :] Sex just doesn't come across to me as something I want to explore. And I actually used to want kids when I was a teenager, but now that I've matured, I don't. <x} Very don't. It's not happening, not going to. It's one of the things I'm most certain of actually. (Sorry mom and dad.)

I'm still dealing with myself but I'm not ashamed. <:c Just kind of depressed about how I can't fit in very well with anyone, and not being as skilled and confident as my family in interacting with others anymore.

anxiety anxiety anxiety anxiety anxiety

also, yes, sexualities and gender can be fluid.

i definitely didn't think/know i was ace until i was... 20? at least. but meds may have played a part in that. i also def had way less interest in... any of that.

i do not ever want to have kids. adopting, perhaps. the idea of bearing children creeps me out to no end. unfortunate for my parents. i am their only child.

...i am still attempting to convince myself that it is entirely my own decision to not have kids, regardless of whether i am "depriving my parents of the experience of having grandchildren", as my mind likes to put it.

<:] Ahh perhaps I can fit in after all...if only a little.

:c Had a sad shower time. Had a sad attack and went into system shutdown mode today. :[ Took a long shower. Forgot what I was even doing, and why I was doing it. Didn't feel like getting out of the shower..but then the water eventually got cold.
Haven't felt empty and despairing like that for a long time..and by a long time I think I mean since two months ago. <-<;

...anxiety/depression attack high five. Or low five, because I'm out of spoons.

been combating that by listening to music.

*low fives the Espy* -w- it's cool.
Glad to have functioning ears still at least to listen to coping music with too, heh.

(But I moved my headphones someplace weird again so now I can't find them. >m<)

Actually, if I set it up as a direct withdrawal, there is no fee. Unless I can pick up a better second job (or a third job xP or sell 2-3 stuffed animals a month, minimum) my budget will be "literal starvation diet" tight for the year, but I can set up a monthly payment plan.
So my stress is slightly lower. But only slightly.

got angry about... a lot of things. punched a table. can't feel half my hand.

Felt like I didn't do shit today...again. >-> Even though I sorta did laundry and...yeah that's kinda it...maybe I'll do the dishes just to make me feel accomplished..

Tired, plus burnt out on that ukagaka project. I've been meaning to release the guy for three days, and I can't get an update system set up just yet, but that's fine, I can do that in the next update.

What I need to do is write up a tumblr post for him and hope the tagging system actually bloody works. Which it probably won't.

Mother's old Chiweenie, the one who's the father of my Winnie who looks out for my medical condition, just bit a hole in my left ring finger over a piece of cellophane. Got it covered and Neosporined, but the emotional damagie is far more significant.

Nobody ate my pasta...I guess I'll finish the rest. -_-