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I have been practicing making things with the crystal, more than lanterns. I can say with 98% certainty that I can make anything now. I am willing to make a neat thing for you once per festival day, as long as you provide me with one (1) funny/terrible/etc. joke, jape, or quip. If you send a pun you will be permanently disqualified, blocked, and liquefied.

And no, you cannot choose what the thing is. Just believe it'll be neat. Thank you for your participation! :D

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.

>:/
I guess.

i was going to post a meme about candles, but like

i went to look for one and there were

a lot

of weenies

*stunned at pun portion of rules*

Are humorous images allowed?

inb4 patrick learns about memes.

Images are allowed, but they must be Very Good.

Ok, here's a joke both funny and terrible at the same time:

A frog telephones the psychic hotline. The fortune teller tells him "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."

The frog is thrilled! "This is great! Will I meet her at a party?"

"No", says the fortune teller. "In her biology class."

are we allowed to send videos, patrick.

Videos are many many pictures, I'd say they're fair game.

Wonderful work, Death.

I love you for forbidding puns.

also I googled crystal jokes and all I'm getting is either Billy Crystal or crystal meth. Why are you failing me, google

That made me feel things in my happy so I'll count that as your joke for today, mdom.

https://youtu.be/kpk2tdsPh0A

it's just the, uhhhhhhhhhh. half an a press video. very wild.

Thank you. I was actually tempted to send a pun, but at the same time I do respect not everyone enjoys them.

Something relatable...