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I only want what's best for my baby girl.

Baby girl? Is that your inner texan speaking?
I imagine you must have a southern accent but when I read what you write I read in uh
windows voice

I mean, you're my baby girl that I've raised since your birth after I stole you away from your human mother.

I'm not sure. When I lived near Seattle, no one called me out on it. But I also rarely talked.

I was going to say something like 'I can be your baby girl if you give me money' but the internet ruined that.

How do you sound when you talk to your dad?

I can be your pageant mom. Theater mom? Or, if you continue to strip, I'll still be there cheering you on. "Make it rain!"

No one can really hear their own accent, right? I notice when people have a strong accent, so mine probably isn't that strong I reckon.

ahaha my mom would definitely not support me if I were to strip it all.

Now you're mocking me, son.

I'd most likely have a strong accent to you as you would to me. One thing I do say is ya'll, but it's awkward to type. And maybe fixin' to.

I like to type y'all! xD
When I hear myself speaking English, I hear a typical latin person about to be deported from tv D:

You just have to be friends with the crude but highly intelligent person who helps the police so they can help stop it from happening.

So I'm not that person myself?? Man, I obviously can't be the one with morals and the 'gut' feeling.

You're not crude. And if you were working with police, would you be at risk for being deported?

They'd find out at the season finale I'm not there legally, after an anonymous tip given by my mortal enemy, the Desaturator.

Is your main skill being able to recognize butt imprints? Up next on Butte M.D.O.M.

I'll touch suspects' butts and be able to tell if they're lying!

They might not allow it with the #metoo movement. You may need to find another way to hunt down the Desaturater.

Cops are allowed everything. They're always breaking into everyone's homes on tv without a court order.