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"There are two people here arguing over coding... They're not paying attention, so you snag 9 tea lights."

This scenario instantly came to mind:
"I coded this website"
"For the nth time, HTML is NOT code, it is a markup language!" |D

You've startled a Witch! But they're a Good Witch, and give you 6 tea lights after you apologize!

HTML is totally code. Just because it's not Turing-complete doesn't mean it's not a (declarative) programming language.

"Oh! 2 tea lights. These will go perfectly with your severed head... I mean, what?
Thanks for posting!
Have a Gold Tarnished Filter!"

Severed head + tarnished filter = 100% instagram worthy

"You've found Den's yarn stash! Wait why are 6 tealights in here?!"

Den, what are you doing?

Trying to make all the things!!!

You found 4 tea lights, batteries not included.

QUIT RUINING MY OLD SCHOOL WAX TEA LIGHTS

Swiper swiped some tea lights for me.

I had to post this one.

My army has arrived.

EDIT:
Oh, NOOOOOW we're using actual wax. Pick a side, troglodytes!

"It is no small wonder that the wild tea light has survived in nature for the millions of years it has existed. Here, we see a group of 9 passing the night by flickering, always on guard against predators and yet helpless should one come upon them."

Well that was quite the story.

Nouveau! Au escargot!

"You've found Den's yarn stash! Wait why are 9 tealights in here?!"

Ayyy! 8D

"You tap the crystal with a hammer in just the right place, and it shatters to let you reach 4 tea lights."

Why on earth are you trying to get me to eat wax???

W-why are the tea ...? Or is the TREES scampering?!?

I've gotten the Time to summon a Demon one three times in a row now. Is Trisphee trying to tell me something?

@Mekatra: GOOBLE GOBBLE GOOBLE GOBBLE, ONE OF US! ONE OF US!

What?

(conspicuously tries to hise severed head collection)

>_>;; <_<;;

DO.

NOT.

YEET.

AT MAJOR.

*slices up the unfunny Vine memes with a khopesh*
YEET THIS, MOTHERHECKERS