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I used to sleep on one of those couch futon things.
Except, I took the futon part off and just put it on the floor and slept on it that way.
It was extremely comfortable. But then, sometimes I find sleeping on a hard floor to be comfortable.

Daily Awful ;
The manager of the gym I go to always brings his little dog... She's super cute, but I feel like she despises me. I try petting her and sometimes she growls at me...
And honestly, it's upsetting me more than it probably should...

I keep thinking, "damn, am i a bad person because this dog doesn't like me?" "she doesn't do this to me ALL the time? maybe it's just this once?" "Maybe I should just keep my distance?"

It's stupid but I've been thinking about this dog all last night and most of today...???

My brain is so silly... Why waste this time and energy being anxious and worried about a DOG!?!

Ugh. Ugh, today my work shifts are too close together for me to go home and have lunch and I don't have any quick breakfast foods, so unless I leave the museum exactly at 11, and hustle so I have time to grab a quick coffee and pastry on the go at a coffee shop along the way, I won't have time to eat anything for the next 8-9 hours.

chances are the dog is annoyed about having its space invaded. idk what kind of breed it is.

been a while since i've had a dog, so i can't give any advice.

Spilled a bit of coffee today. QuQ It wasn't much but nooo my coffee.

I hate feeling powerless.

I don't need to feel powerless cause I am powerless. x_x

friend is kinda sick and i'm nervous and worried about him.

also another friend is dating someone he's known for a month tops and i'm sort of vaguely jealous because i had a crush on him but that one's on me that time.

I always believe that we are much stronger than we give ourselves credit for.

Like this quote from Winnie The Pooh;


I believe in my friends.
Life is hard as it is, and even just the fact that you're both here is a huge feat of strength and power.

I think sometimes we don't realize just how hard it is to choose life really is. <3

empathy machine is being weird again.

Ehhhh if you wanna put it that way sure x_X

Idk exactly what or how, but I've fucked up my back. XP

Mm... I appreciate the attempt. I sincerely do. It's good to feel like I've got another friend. :)

But that wasn't a depression type of powerlessness. Under normal circumstances I'm able to resolve or at least address basically any problem I encounter. It's because I'm usually the strong one that failure sucks so much -- when I come across a significant issue that I really can't do anything about, but it's too important to just suck it up and say "oh well," it can feel crushing.

how to tell someone not to armchair diagnose their abuser w/ narcissism / npd bc it creates a stigma against ppl with npd in the first place

<x'}
I'm such a loser compared to my friends lol. Despite them attempting to assure me that they make messes and are clueless from time to time, I'm still the only one who can't seem to get myself together. ;U; Mmmg! <x'} Wish I could hide under a box.

figured out how, ended up being a mild miscommunication on both ends, as is... annoyingly common.

oh, that's a mood, mers. one of my friends is in college, an ex-friend of mine is trying to become an animator, and i'm just sitting here, without a single GCSE or college certificate thing and without a job. my older brother is a known youtuber and my sister works at a hospital.

;U; And then it's just painful when anyone asks, "what are you up to?" because you are always up to something so miniscule or completely unproductive and not at all interesting to the person asking, and you feel like a total waste of space and time. ;-; And it's worse when you get asked, "Why don't you have a job yet?" and "What are you working towards?"
;W; My job is picking up after others and to practice prioritizing myself while having to prioritize others...and I'm working towards my inevitably cold and lonely demise because I don't seem to be interested in doing frickin' ANYthing except for the things that people don't care about and pay me next-to-nothing to do. ;U; </3

Meanwhile everyone else is either job hopping, or has a clear set career path already. T-T Wish I knew what it was like to be so sure of myself..