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I can read your mind, but I'm illiterate.

I can armpit-fart the alphabet.
Not really, but that would be an interesting party trick.

I can destroy everything with my super strength ... only if I use a giant hammer.

I have the ability to change the color of any object, but I can only change things to be Brown.

I have the power to grow my hair, but only after a couple of years has passed. >.<

I have the ability to make people blink D:

Not going to lie Snow, That is a pretty amazing power. ;D

I can make day turn into night, but only after 12 hours has passed. >.<

I have this amazing power to make my mom yell at me for hours. XD

I have the amazing ability to find anything, but only if I already knew where it was. >.<

I've got this awesome power to annoy the ever loving hell outta people... Then get beaten for it x_x

I have the power to tell when it's going to rain, but only if it's already raining.

I have the power to turn things into cookies!!! but only if i have the ingredients to make them.

I have the power to make homework vanish, but only if you've already done it.

I have the amazing ability to sleep all day but only if i've stayed up all night the night before.

at times I have the ability to tell the future, but only after I can no longer do anything about it

I have X-ray visions....only when I'm drunk XD